Culture Pro Wrestling

We Made A List Of Who Should Play VINCE MCMAHON in a Movie, DAMMIT!

The Vince McMahon biopic has been the stuff of legend for years now.  Recently in 2017 it picked up some steam with Bradley Cooper apparently being linked as a possible leading man, however, that’s just not enough to hold over my friends and I here at badforbrand.com .  We need answers DAMMIT, and since we’re too impatient, we decided we’d help out and deliver them to you FOR FREE.  After all, that’s what being a wrestling fan is all about, right?  YOU GOTTA FANTASY BOOK, BABY!  WHO IS GONNA GO OVER?!?! Now, spoiler alert!, Roman Reigns is NOT one of the suggestions, although Vince would definitely be all for it.

Seriously though, I don’t think there could be a bigger role for an actor than playing Vince McMahon.  He’s literally like his own folklore and urban legend.  Every story ever told about Vinny Mac is usually completely outlandish, but at the same time believable, because well, it’s Vince Fucking McMahon, that’s why.  I’m sure some of them are exaggerated and others are total bullshit, but I personally don’t give a shit  If you told me Vince survived a nuclear blast I’d believe you.  If you told me that he was gonna live until 150 years old, I’d believe you.  Do you see where I getting at?  You can’t just cast anyone to play this guy.  It needs to be someone special.  It needs to be someone PERFECT.

Anyway, the three of us, Richie, Burgess and myself have put together the ultimate Vince McMahon actor list. It can be found below.  Personally I think we did a pretty good job of thinking both inside and outside the box.  If I had to guess, you’ll probably think that some of the choices are spot on, while thinking that other suggestions would be worse booking decisions than Bayley’s main roster run.  RING THE BELL! …

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3. Nicholas Cage

Sure, we all use him as a meme now, but have we forgotten how awesome Nick Cage is as an actor? The guy crushes it in big time rolls. Cameron Poe, Dr. Stanely Goodspeed, Memphis Raines, & Ben Franklin Gates. Those are just some of the all time great characters that Nicholas Cage has taken to new heights. Add that to his wild card weirdness nowadays, and you got a Vince McMahon who can entertain like a sonofabitch. Him as this gif is all you need to see to get it.

vince fall     NickCage

2. Bryan Cranston

Bryan Cranston is my personal number one choice for the role. The guy can play that cunning, angry side of vince better than anyone out there i think. Look at what he did with Walter White. Vince has a Walter White side to him where he loves to be in control and knows he’s better at whatever he does than his competition.

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1. Bradley Cooper

The magical story of Vince McMahon started in his younger years, when he bought the company from his dad, Vince Sr, and decided he was going to take wrestling from a business of territories, to a massive touring product. You can’t have an older actor play such a strapping young man like Vince. So I think that Bradley Cooper would be a great choice for this role. He has that Vinny Mac swag to him.

bc

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3. Tom Hardy

He can play Vinny Mac from the earlier years of the 80s into today, he’s about 40 right now. He has impeccable acting chops whether it’s Bane, Venom, The Drop, Mad Max, Bronson, you name it…he has insane range. You need that to play the boss man. From serious, to funny and wacky, to exuberant and outgoing, to scary angry as hell. Most importantly, he could actually fill out one of Vincent’s suits with his frame. If that doesn’t work out, he could also play a mean Macho Man Randy Savage.

tomhardy

2. Vince Vaughn

Fuck it. Let’s go BOLD. The guy can out-talk a used car salesman and throw quick jab lines like a melody. The early days of announcing he could nail in this regard. I believe he could even hit the low guttural growling lines of “YOU’RE FIRED” or “NO CHANCE IN HELL.” From one Vinny to another, he could emulate the 72 year-old CEO as the motorboatin’ SOB he is. I could see Vince Vaughn with the flamboyant, swaggy, pompous walk in a tailored suit on his way to the ring right now. Season Two of True Detective and 50 percent of Vince’s recent films are dumpster fires but he was a pleasant surprise in Brawl in Cell Block 99. This could be another redemption role performance.

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1. Michael Shannon

This one almost seems TOO perfect. I am a huge fan of his work, from Shape of Water to Boardwalk Empire to Superman to Revolutionary Road and even smaller films like Midnight Special and Take Shelter. He has a very similar voice and command like Vince. He can be a believable businessman, commentator, entertainer and dreamer. He acts with fucking BALLS. He can be a genius and he can CERTAINLY play an asshole. He has a wicked smile like the devil Vincent Kennedy McMahon himself. The maniacal laughter and the fire in the eyes only Shannon could completely deliver on. It’s not up for debate. The guy is one of the best method actors around today, back up the brinks truck guys. Shannon is the new age Nicolas Cage, certified crazy but fire on the big screen.

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3. Hugh Jackman

If we’re talking the stature and presence of a Vince McMahon, you gotta go with my boy, Wolverine as a leading man.  He’s over 6 feet tall and lights up a room with those pearly whites and sexy accent.  Now, Vince may not light up a room with Hugh’s charm, but you can bet your ass he commands it.  In fact, Vince McMahon commands a room like no other, and we’re not just talking about the boardroom, we’re talking about the gym as well.  Vince is straight up JACKED and has been for the majority of his life. So is Jackman, who I believe has the perfect amount of VASCULARITY that Vince loves.  Let’s also not sleep on Jackman’s chiseled jaw line, which is definitely something that Vinny Mac would approve of.  All the makeup department would need to do is exaggerate Vince’s signature chin dimple, and BAM, I’M VINCE MCMAHON, GOD DAMMIT!!

Also, they have already worked together in the past, which is a plus.  It was only a few years ago (back when Zack Ryder was getting a push) that Hugh starred on the WWE as a guest host of Monday Night RAW.  Lastly, I have a thing for all of these Australians that can change their accent to sound American.  I’ve always been fascinated by that.

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2. David Boreanaz

A blast from the past and I bet you didn’t see that coming you little jabroni.  Yep, Angel from Buffy The Vampire Slayer is gonna play Vincent Kennedy McMahon.  Ya know, I felt that considering we’re talking about the WWF/WWE where ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN (in Vince’s voice) that it would be appropriate to throw the readers a little curve ball, a little swerve if you will.  After all, wrestling is always best when you can be surprised, well, SURPRISE!!, I didn’t pick Hugh Jackman’s co-star in the prestige, Christian Bale.  That would have been too obvious.  You get Buffy’s boyfriend.  Deal with it.

From a visual standpoint, I think it works.  He’s got the look of a billionaire who hails from Greenich, Connecticut if you ask me.  Also, Vince had has a special connection with vampires dating back to when the Brood was one of the coolest factions to ever step foot in the squared circle.

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1. Josh Brolin

If you live under a rock, Josh Brolin just played Thanos in Avengers: Infinity War, where after collecting all 6 infinity stones he became the most powerful man in the Universe … other than Vince McMahon of course.  You can guaran-damn-tee that if Thanos snapped his fingers in a world Vince McMahon lived in that McMahon wouldn’t be turning into space particles.  NO FUCKIN’ CHANCE IN HELL.

Brolin is THE guy in my opinion.  He’s got the look, the stature and the pedigree (pun intended).  His work is second to none and I have a feeling that Vince would approve whole-heartedly of having Brolin portray him in every way possible. I’m talking WWF Vince, Attitude Era Vince and this latest installment of jacked grandpa Vince.

… and Finallllllyyyyyyyyyy, I can pretty much guarantee that Brolin would have no problem mimicking Vince’s deep guttural voice on command.  Just seems  like it’s meant to be.

'Only the Brave' film screening, Arrivals, New York, USA - 17 Oct 2017

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