Gym & Fitness

CUBICLES & CROSSFIT: Partner WODs – If You’re Partner 2, You’re Screwed

It’s the weekend and it’s a Partner WOD.  You’re pumped because it’s a gorgeous day outside and your fitness goals are tied more to cardio.  After all, being strong is cool, but you know deep down all you want is to be able to grate cheese off your stomach.  This is why the weekends are key, because you know you’re gonna row, run, burpee or do something high volume.  Because of this, there may be times when you feel like you can’t go anymore, but you still do it, because your partner depends on you … and because you don’t want to look like a total pussy … HOWEVER …

When you’re Partner 2 in the Partner WOD, shit gets real, real quick.  Let me tell ya, I feel guilty offering to go first at this point because whoever I’m paired with knows what’s up. You know and I know that whoever is Partner 2 is gonna be straight up GASSED heading into the transition for each workout.  Also, if you’re like me, you don’t want to look like a sloppy jaloppy and slow down the team, so you push on.  You straight up can’t breath, haven’t gotten your second wind, but you have something like burpee pull-ups on deck where you have no choice but to jump blindly in the air and pray that you find a grip on that bar.   PLEASE JESUS LET IT BE THERE WHEN I THROW MY HANDS UP!  SOMEONE GET ME MORE CHALK!

There are certain exercises that you know are gonna be absolute hell in partner WODS.  My least favorite is rowing.  Why you ask?  Because there’s nothing worse than being Partner 2 and having to head into the next portion of the WOD when Partner 1 has been crushing electrolytes for 2 minutes while you flailed around on that death machine like a dead fish (all arms, no legs, all day).  And you JUST KNOW that after rowing 2,000 meters that you’re gonna have something awful like Thrusters to follow.   Those are the worst, because it’s where you can’t half ass anything because you can get called out for a million things … For example: you didn’t get deep enough on the squat, you didn’t get full extension at the top or my personal favorite, you don’t pull your head back in time and take a Mike Tyson-eque uppercut to your chin with the barbell. 8 … 9 … 10 …He’s out!!

So I think I’ve covered why being Partner 2 is less than ideal, but don’t let me discourage you.  Maybe you like the challenge? My advice?  Don’t be a bitch and call Partner 1 from get-go, instead, just do what I do and look at the person you’re partnered with.  Take a look into their eyes, not too deep, don’t be creepy, and when they find out they have to crank out 30 chest to bar pull-ups after rowing more than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, you should have your answer.  If they look like a deer in headlights, throw them a bone and take on the role of Partner 2 and embrace the pain.

Bon Voyage, Bro.

Follow me @NickVacation on Twitter.

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