Pro Wrestling

Enzo Amore Found Guilty Of Violating Ear Drums With Bad Rap Song

This sucks, because I really like Enzo as an entertainer.  I even wrote about how I want the WWE to bring him back after he was cleared off all charges and had his case closed regarding false accusations by some lunatic ..

But as it turns out, Enzo has committed a crime after all.   No, not concerning his previous case, I’m talking about the crime that was dropped on us via the fine people over at World Star Hip Hop less than an hour ago.  Bottom line, that shit was not good.  I actually expected way more from Enzo.  Everything from the tone, the hook, the beat, the anger, it just was just … not … good.  I can’t defend it.  If I was asked to be his public defender for this, I’d have to turn down the gig because there’s no chance in hell you don’t get sent to the chair by a jury for that song.  Here’s the video …

Sorry about that guys.  Didn’t mean to put you through that and rob you of that 4:47.  I mean, for weeks I’ve been waiting eagerly to see what Enzo would do.  Like I said before, I’m a huge fan.  I truly believe that he is (was) the best promo in the WWE since the Attitude Era.  No one brought it like Enzo.  No one had his ability to flip the script, remember his lines (that he wrote) and deliver them with sheer unadulterated veracity.   If I’m being honest, I think he’s better than Cena.  In fact, the only person who I think can go toe to toe with him right now is The Miz.   You can’t teach real and in my opinion, no one is conveys real like Enzo Amore and The Miz.  @Real1 and The Real World.  Coincidence?  I think not.  Moving on …

However .. Enzo’s song, while he is the Real1, that song was Real Bad.  Bad For Brand as we say over by these parts.  I just didn’t get it.  I know he’s angry.   Angry is probably an understatement actually, but I felt he tried to get everything out in one song.  Like dude, save that shit for the full album.  This was NOT the debut single we needed to hear.  Hell, your own theme song is better than this, so we know you have skills.  SAWFT is the Enzo we want, not a dude dragging a casket through the desert like he’s The Big Bossman excavating The Big Show’s “Daddy”.

In all honestly, I’m just fucking confused by what I heard.  I know Enzo’s better.  He may be doin’ fine, but I just checked the analytics on the YouTube post from WSHH and the likes to dislikes ratio “ain’t doin” too good.

As for the positives … I will say that the best part of the video was that sloppy jaloppy he had play what has to be a modern day wrestling fan “stereotype”.  I mean just look at this dude …

fatt

I use quotes around “stereotypes” because there are definitely legit people just like that, crushing oreos and staining their gross fingers with cheetos while judging the moonsault execution of world class athletes.   They’re the type of people that live for the dirt sheets and online forums to flex their opinion that no one asked for.  So for that, I give an A+ in terms of casting and cinematography.  As for the rest, I’d do Enzo a solid and mark this as “incomplete”.  He might be “reincarnated” like the video set, but my ears are dead … like Undertaker dead.

Shake this one off, Enzo.  I got faith.

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