Culture Pro Wrestling

Only The Rock Could Make A Movie About A God Damn Building Worth Seeing

No, you saw that right. The movie is called Skyscraper. About well….a very, very big skyscraper. The biggest and best in the world. Only fitting that the dude to save everyone from said skyscraper is the biggest and best dude on the planet: Dwayne Johnson. Ever since I saw this was a future production in The Rock’s IMDB (I check it daily, no lie), I could not stop laughing. A building! No, no Dan! A really TALL building. Okay, that’s not the whole premise and that’s not fair. But seriously, The Rock has worked with less before like San Andreas which is basically The Rock fighting rock…well earthquakes but still. The Rock fought mutated animals turned into giant monsters in Rampage basically protecting buildings from them…but now…the buildings have turned on The Rock (set to dramatic music). Ok, I will stop.

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Dwayne Johnson is easily the coolest person (yeah the guy above) to ever have the name Dwayne and it’s not even close. I mean Dwayne sounds like a dude working as a janitor. But at the end of the day, he’s The Rock, the most electrifying man in, no not sports entertainment, just entertainment straight up. Everyone thinks The Rock has already peaked in Hollywood. Well, I got news for you. The next two years you’re going to be paying your mortgage/rent, you car and phone payments, cable and electricity, and 20 percent of your pay is going to anything with The Rock in it. He’s in everything. He ended 2017 with blockbuster Jumanji (and it was actually and surprisingly good IMO). 2018 alone: Rampage, Skyscraper and the TV show Ballers. Okay, not too much. 2019? BOOM. Fighting With My Family, Jumanji 2, Suicide Squad 2, Hobbs and Shaw (follow up to Central Intelligence). Then sometime between now and 2020: Red Notice with John Cena, Jungle Cruise, Black Adam, San Andreas 2, Doc Savage and Big Trouble in Little China (!!!). Holy Mary Mother of God. He should just be called The Box Office.

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One thing is for sure. No matter the plot, the enemy, the remaining cast (did I mention he has to co-star with Neve Campbell in Skyscraper? Yikes) or how many movies he’s taking on at once, he will outdo expectations and give the people what they want: bang for their buck. I have said before and I will say it again: The Rock is the greatest action hero of all time. Sorry Arnold and Sly. It’s Dwayne. A guy named Dwayne is more badass than you ever were. So what do you say? Let’s all march our way to the nearest overpriced theater and see an ex pro wrestler take down a fucking building with one leg. Yeah, his left leg is amputated in this film too. The Rock takes on ALL ODDS July 13th. Let’s. Go. JUST BRING IT. Boots 2 Asses. Okay, you get it.

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